|“||Don't ever embarrass me like that again. I'm your wife, not some San Pedro tart.||”|
|— Linda to Peter[src]|
Linda is the wife of Dr. Peter Craft, who is head of the isolationist German-American Bund, and mother to Trevor and Tom. She is a fading American Beauty rose, disappointed with her husband and bored with her constrained suburban life.
Throughout the SeriesEdit
Linda joins her family in the kitchen and warns her husband, Peter that he’ll be late for work, leading to the topic of the new roads being built through Belvedere Heights. Before leaving, unbeknownst to Linda, Peter tell their maid, Maria Vega that Linda needs to rest today and that she should not take any alcohol.
At the Craft house, Peter has sex with his wife, Linda. He imagines that it’s Elsa and gets rough with her, grabbing her by her throat. Afterward, Linda scolds him, reminding Peter that she’s his wife, "not some San Pedro tart."
The Crafts hosts Tom’s birthday party in his backyard. Peter has invited his German comrades. Linda watches from the top of the hill at the open bar as Peter and Elsa sing. Later, Elsa asks Linda where she can find the powder room. Linda tells her that it’s down the hall, past the kitchen. She then tells Elsa that Peter isn’t who he pretends to be and that she should ask Peter about Essen and his family there. Linda refuses to be turned into anything so banal as the rejected wife.
The Crafts play a game of Sorry! together as a family. Tom and Trevor explain the rules of the game to their father. Tom then asks Peter to buy a magazine subscription as his debate team is raising money for a trip. Peter offers to buy all 10. Trevor wonders if that’s cheating, which alarms Peter. The phone rings. Linda tells Peter to let it ring, but he answers it. Elsa is on the other end. She asks him to come over as something’s happened to her husband. Peter grabs his bag and tells them that he has to leave for an emergency. Linda is unconvinced and starts smoking, stating that it was too good to last.
Peter has filed for a divorce from Linda. He blames himself. He hasn’t been able to give her what she needs, and he can see that she's unhappy. Linda claims that she can change and be happier, however, Peter has already made up his mind. He’s moving Linda out and Elsa in. He reminds her that no authority in the state will side with her. He has arranged for her to be checked into a sanitarium to be treated for intemperance and hysteria. He tells her that she will go there without a hint of unpleasantness if she wishes to see their boys again. Linda knows Peter. While he may feel strong, she promises him that he isn’t.
Peter visits Linda at the clinic. She asks about their children. Peter replies that they’re doing well. Linda reveals that her hair hasn’t been washed in two weeks and they cut her nails so that she wouldn’t scratch her eyes out. And her roommate is from Bakersfield. She has a dairy farm with her husband and misses her cows. Peter has brought custody papers for Linda to sign. However, she will have her family’s lawyer look over the papers. Linda warns Peter that she won’t be locked up forever and that her father had some ideas on how to best litigate their domestic travails. Linda tells Peter that he can keep the kids and the house. She’ll go to Reno and wait out the divorce. However, as soon as it’s all legal, Linda will make it her mission to take Peter’s life apart. She calls Peter a fraud and wonders what he’ll do when everyone finds out who he really is. She tells him to bring a lawyer next time he visits. Peter then leaves.
Appearance and PersonalityEdit
Powers and AbilitiesEdit
- Santa Muerte
- Dead People Lie Down
- Josefina and the Holy Spirit
- Children of the Royal Sun
- How It Is With Brothers
- Hide and Seek